DM Bugle

Attack on Kingsman

By ProfessorCoke

Sorry but we’ve been interrupted with a special article, sadly the scheduled article of the jedi is no more. Instead we’ve uncovered disturbing footage from an unknown source. Users discretion advised

This footage is straight from Kingsman owned by BENELf and Acenp4. Yes the same exact professional hitmen. (We’re broke okay we can’t afford different people). These shambles seemed to have left the life of being a hitmen and set up a shop but you should know that you can’t escape the life of a hitmen.

This footage shows a missile hitting the mansion where Kingsman is located. At this present moment the mansion is perfectly fine so either this is fake or a video sent from the future. :0

Someone is trying to warn us. Now then you may be wondering why I’m doing an article on some irrelevant shop. I ran out of material. Please can you guys start some actual drama, thanks. 

Now then we decided to interview one of the shop owners Acen.

Q:So you’ve seen the footage of a missile hitting your mansion? How have you been affected by this?

A: This has of course come as a great shock. We will soon start a full scale evacuation. However we are still not sure as to the origin launch of the missile. We sus the Jedi or the sith since they smell. 

Q:Do you believe that this footage is real? and not a ploy from your competitors?

A:We believe it to be real after our own weapons defensive systems showed the incoming projectile. The missiles exact course has not been identified yet

Q:How can people help you? 

A: Well the best way is to first of apply here: https://forms.gle/8ohyGnZfxcTLDx5K9

We then want to launch some new recruits against the missile to avert its trajectory.

No trailer this time since it’s the same as last week.

Poor ASwagMelon who also is an owner but was forgotten lol

war war war war